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Treatise Online Civility

I’ve worn many hats in many careers. When I say many, I mean it; anything to stay afloat as an artist and anything to earn while growing up without a lot/much of anything – I started working at nine-years-old and haven’t stopped since, except for my maternity leave and after a month couldn’t take it and started teaching spin classes just to make sure I was bringing something in (this is who I am, you may think I grew up during the depression, I did, my mother’s.).

In most of my roles, I have very quickly moved into positions of leadership. I believe this is because I most often handle, almost every situation, with diplomacy. I try to consider each situation holistically. I’ve made mistakes, I’ve taken ownership of them. I am not perfect. And with each mistake, I have tried to grow and find my fault in the matter. Then I try to let it go and move on.

If I could teach one thing to everyone/anyone/all people it would be to think before you speak. There should never be a time after sending an email, a text message, or any other form of communication to a person where your follow-up communication, upon their response, should be an attempt to take back the harshness of your words. Never have I ever received an apology for a biting email, but after a measured and informed response – from me, I have received such obtuse apologies as so you know, I wasn’t being harsh, OR so you know I wasn’t blaming you but, OR so you know it’s your fault I came at you because I didn’t understand my role.

*insert heavy eye rolls*

Listen to me now: edit your anger before sending your hate and making it someone else’s to carry. Take a step back and think first. Even if you want to be a prick, do it with grace and tact, do it skillfully. Ask your writer friend to write some prose filled with a passive-aggressive subtext that is mellow and comical and would not require a non-apologetic email follow-up.

But above all else, stop sounding stupid and petulant, because we all stop listening when you sound stupid and you won’t be long for the job if you continue your petulance.

Thank you.

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